The Voices Behind Her Flowers: Part Two
By: Daniela Miranda
A few weeks have passed since our first introductory post from Her Flowers group members. The reactions from friends, family, acquaintances and strangers were overwhelmingly warm and real, thank you.
A little more about Dani
Since 2012, I have lived in southern Spain, a country that has welcomed me with community, jamón, blue skies, history lessons, and siesta. However, I am constantly reminded how US American, or “gringa” I am in my ways--mostly around eating schedules and an internalized capitalist attitude around consumption (the constant flow of my air conditioner and stocking up at the grocery store). Although my Venezuelan-inspired accent can spark the “wait, where are you from?” question, most of the time I spend my days appearing Spanish-like but feeling very American.
On the flip side, when I’m back stateside with my American community, I feel very Latina from the inside out--a family-first approach to holiday planning with meals that take hours of prepping (shout out to Papi’s Cuban roast!) and my brother’s “Latin Music for the Soul” Spotify playlist.
As a teen, my parents didn’t understand that I wanted freedom to be out with my friends, and my friends did not understand why my parents were strict. This caused many tensions throughout the years. Nowadays, my friends no longer question that we will be barbecuing at my house to maximize my time with family and friends.
I now understand that the story I narrate around my identity is contextual, and time based, ever-changing and dynamic. A form of self-preservation, while at the same time a form of seeking connection.
The more I explore who I am within the systems and how systems guide our decision-making and write our personal stories, the more I am able to navigate difficult conversations and understand the state of the world--where I stand in it, who I stand for, what is wrong and how can I contribute to make it right.
Her Flowers members journeys toward anti-racism
As a community psychologist, I could go on and on about how the political is personal and the personal is political. It is clear that Her Flowers has become a space for us to share our personal experiences, to critically think about the world around us, build trusting relationships with one another and DO something.
For Elina, the 13-year-old social media guru from Davis, California, she registered that “when George Floyd was murdered, that was the first time I really was old enough to realize that there was a big problem and innocent people were losing their lives because of our messed up system and our racist country.”
During Her Flowers sessions she was able to connect and find ways to do something while being stuck inside during the pandemic, “by talking with girls my age from across the country and Canada it was really eye-opening to see how both similar and different our experiences were.”
Julie’s experience was similar to my own. I was a little slower to start, but as I said before, we always end up on the same page sooner or later.
After graduating college at 21, Julie says she “knew nothing about white-privilege.” A summer-stint following graduation at an urban farm in Berkley, California rapidly changed that. “Cue feelings of sadness, regret, helplessness. I was heartbroken. I felt helpless. While at Boston University, I was studying and believed in Public Health, yet I wasn’t learning about systemic oppression. Since then, I’ve made it a priority to have a social justice lens in all the work that I do. It informs me both professionally and personally.”
Julie and I both knew what we were missing from our late start on this journey was a mix of support, a critical education lens, and exchange with trusting peers. Instead of looking for it within our established communities, we wanted to make sure that younger women had the opportunity that was missing from our teenage years.
The magic behind an intergenerational group of women
Julie and I text on a daily basis, mostly about new ideas or logistical aspects for Her Flowers. At some point within these exchanges we comment on how wonderful the younger women are. It has been only two months since we began working on Her Flowers and the co-production between us has been amazing.
I admire the young women who want to be a part of something and navigate these times with purpose. Mostly, I am grateful because they energize me to learn more, reflect, question and keep going. In Julie’s words, “it’s so amazing to see young women passionate and willing to learn about all the hard things that make us American citizens.”
Elina also feels that spark that comes from exchanging our intergenerational experiences, “It was inspiring to hear Dani and Julie’s stories and hear about their different experiences. They are so nice and you can see how passionate they both are.“
The varying perspectives due to the age differences and the contextual underpinnings this implies for our individual narratives is an aspect that resonates with Ava, “It is really interesting to get a perspective from women of a different age. I think this helps to bridge a gap in knowledge that may be missing. This helps to illuminate different facets of these issues that I may not consider because of my age, but others think about more.”
Looking towards the future
I daydream about the future of Her Flowers every single day. And I mean, actual daydreaming. I envision teen girls running the show.
Julie and I would be backstage setting up and guiding their vision through our experience and knowledge while making sure that Her Flowers becomes theirs. I imagine this opening up across the country, girls finding strength in numbers to address issues that matter to them and their communities.
As I’ve mentioned, Julie and I really share this vision, “I'd love to see this group grow into chapters that meet across the country. Dani and I will lead the organizational component and young girls will run the meetings. It's a space for them, and most importantly run by them. I hope to continue this work for many years to come!“
The teens are on the same page, according to Elina, “I hope for it to get bigger and more girls will join. Maybe make it a bigger organization. I’m excited and passionate about Her Flowers and I’m excited to see where it goes!”
Ava has identified the different components of what a space like Her Flowers can offer, “I envision Her Flowers becoming bigger and developing an educational side [in the works] as well as a discursive side. I think that this original program will be a first step in creating more issue-focused discussions that could be complemented by more educational stuff.”
We are all committed to expand, connect, learn and continue growing together within an anti-racist framework. We can’t drop the ball now.
Some final thoughts
I am finishing writing this blog post two days after one of the most exciting meetings yet. The girls decided that Her Flowers is no longer a “workshop series” as was the initial vision Julie and I had, we are now officially a GROUP. An anti-racist group for female identifying teens.
This means, as Elina nicely put it at this last meeting, we will add a “Her Flowers twist” to issues that matter to us. We want to tackle different issues from an anti-racist lens.
Each of us brings to the conversation a unique voice, building on our different passions and creating a shared vision (just like the different flowers on our logo!!).
We are a group. We feel it. We believe in it.
To me, Her Flowers shows the power behind recycling knowledge from one generation to the next, creating community, and taking action to ensure that the next generation of women start earlier in these conversations that are necessary to build a better, just world.
